Outside the take-away, Saturday night
a bald adolescent, asks me out for a fight
He was no bigger than a two-penny fart
he was a deft exponent of the martial art
He gave me three warnings:
Trod on me toes, stuck his fingers in my eyes
and kicked me in the nose
A rabbit punch made me eyes explode
My head went dead, I fell in the road
I pleaded for mercy
I wriggled on the ground
he kicked me in the balls
and said something profound
Gave my face the millimetre tread
Stole me chop suey and left me for dead
Through rivers of blood and splintered bones
I crawled half a mile to the public telephone
pulled the corpse out the call box, held back the bile
and with a broken index finger, I proceeded to dial
I couldn’t get an ambulance
the phone was screwed
The receiver fell in half
it had been kung fu’d
A black belt karate cop opened up the door
demanding information about the stiff on the floor
he looked like an extra from Yang Shang Po
he said “What’s all this then
ah so, ah so, ah so.”
he wore a bamboo mask
he was gen’ned on zen
He finished his devotions and he beat me up again
Thanks to that embryonic Bruce Lee
I’m a shadow of the person that I used to be
I can’t go back to Salford
the cops have got me marked
Enter the Dragon
Exit Johnny Clarke
Saturday, 29 August 2009
Friday, 28 August 2009
worcester sauce takes the title!!!
congratulations to vaughn baker on winning the slam city game of skates down in jakes alley!!!
Thursday, 27 August 2009
Monday, 24 August 2009
this is why he's the fuckin boss shag!!!
timmy take a fuckin leaf outta the boss's book n stop pussing around!!!
Sunday, 23 August 2009
baca pro!!!
everyones fave hesh dog sammy baca is now pro for baker skateboards!!!!!
fuck yeah baker for life!!!!
go out n buy his pro board now!!!
Friday, 21 August 2009
Tuesday, 18 August 2009
ooooooow sumoooooooo!!!
check louis from the sumo days!!!
for dem that dont know sumo was the first ever sos shop to hit sheffield and brought up the likes of joel curtis,john winter,neil chester,mark baines just to name a few.
can it be that it was all so simple then......
Wednesday, 12 August 2009
Monday, 10 August 2009
Saturday, 8 August 2009
willies back in town!!!!!!
chesterfield's favourite son winnard is back if you see him buy him a pint!!
Monday, 3 August 2009
FILM OR DIE!!!!!!!!
ravenous would like to give a major shout out to beagle!!!!!!!!
nowison nowison!!!
Saturday, 1 August 2009
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